How does sex usually work for you? Let me take a wild guess – you start with some slow kissing, then the hands move up and down, you may or may not be willing to give/receive some oral, and as the plot thickens, the story of the birds and the bees finally comes to life. Okay, we’re all adults, we can call it sex – you have sex!
Many folks fall into the pitfall of following an uniform sexual script – as long as they have an orgasm, it doesn’t matter how they get there. What we all fail to understand is that sometimes, it’s about the journey and not the destination. Having received my first tantric massage, I’ve learned to appreciate the journey. Trust me when I say, it’s a journey worth walking!
For one, this experience helped me open up to new worlds of pleasure, excitement, and passion. Most importantly, it is the art of tantric massage that helped me connect to my partner who I felt I was losing at the time.
While I can’t promise that a tantric massage will have the same effects on you, I can at least try to explain what it is. If you’re willing to hear me out, I’ll give you some pointers on how to try it at home, too.
But first, let’s cover the basics!
Although often identified with sex, nudity, sexuality, and sometimes promiscuity, tantra is anything but. Tantra is all about connection, a communion — whether that is with yourself or between you and your partner.
The reality is, tantra can enhance your sex life. It does this by heightening your communion to your energy and your own body first. In layman terms, tantra means woven together – whether that being togetherness with your partner, or togetherness with your body, soul, and mind. It means we’re in this together.
Tantric exercises are founded on the principle of intimacy, yet intimacy is more than just getting physical. Intimacy means connecting so deeply that you feel as if you are seeing into your soul – and possibly another’s soul.
I’m a writer and I’m a tantra practitioner. Although I write for a living and do tantra for pleasure, I lack words to express the emotions tantra awakes in me. What I could never imagine as a writer is being left speechless, but I can confirm – tantra leaves a writer wordless. Yes, it’s that powerful.
Always aiming to be honest and real with my readers, I won’t try to play Shakespeare and come up with new words to attach to these newly-discovered tantric sensations I’m experiencing. Instead, I’ll get generic: when you understand and practice tantra, you become extra tuned to your body, what offers it pleasure, and the manner it perceives pleasure. It is only then that you understand and pay considerable attention to your body’s wants and needs and ensure they’re fulfilled.
If you were unsure whether to try tantra with your SO, this is the sign you’ve been looking for. I can tell you from personal experience that once you get into it, you and your partner will learn to be physically aware and spiritually present, feeding each other energy that continues to grow well after you’re done having sex.
One question remains unanswered: I want to try it, but how?
Tantric sex and tantric massage are two different terms – but, oh so similar. The goal remains the same – to be truly, madly, deeply in tune with one another. But, just because there’s a second party involved, doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to connect to another being – it only means to be in touch with another entity – which can also be your senses, emotions, soul, mind.
That said, you can try a tantric massage at home with or without a partner and you can also get the full experience from a masseuse – but, we’ll get to that later.
Before you get to enjoy the blessing of a tantric massage, you need to know how to properly practice it. Here are a few pointers:
Do not overwhelm your partner with too much information. Instead, tell them what you truly like about massages and sex, and how you could enrich the experience.
Pay attention to how they react to your requests. You may receive an enthusiastic yes or a hard no.On the other hand, they may not be sure where they stand. No matter their reaction, pay attention and appreciate their opinion. Not everyone is ready to experience the joys of a tantric massage (if they need some persuasion, feel free to send them this blog), and try to be as patient as possible.
Tantra is a spiritual exercise, which suggests that your mind comes into play as much as your body. Practicing tantra, you connect your body, mind, and soul. You have to be willing to explore out of your comfort zone.
Spending 10 to 15 minutes in deep meditation can help prepare your mind for tantra practice.This is because it allows you to turn inward and evaluate your thoughts.
Tantra is a holistic exercise. It not just about sex or orgasm . It’s about the mission to get there. It’s about the journey, remember!?
Your room’s setting and surrounding environment has a direct impact on your perceptions and your ability to loosen up and relish that mission.
Ensure your space is at a comfortable temperature. Turn on the heat an hour before your session so that the room is comfortable and warm. If it’s hot, turn on the air conditioner, but set it to the high 70’s, so that the space is cool, but not chilly. There are no rules set in stone, though – the optimal temperature is the one that works best for both of you.
Set the mood and tone with scented candles or some tinted light bulbs. This adds fantasy and romance to the space, while soft colored bulbs lend the space a sensual touch.The smell from a scented candle , burning essential oils, some incense sticks, or putting some flowers in the space will turn from a normal space to a romantic getaway.
Soften your space. Use a soft supple satin throw blanket or bed sheet and a few plush cushions to further improve the mood and produce a romantic and heightened sexual vibe. Playing some soft romantic music that you can sensually move to, either by yourself or with your partner will also add to the magic in the room.
If you want to skip through all the trouble, you can always book yourself a massage session. Body Bliss is recognized as the best provider of a tantric massage in Bangkok – take a look at the website, pick your girl, and name the time and place – she’ll arrive when you most need her.
If you ever felt like you miss passion, your sex life is not where you want it to be, or you just need to chill – tantric massage provides. When booking an outcall tantric massage, be aware of exactly what you want to get out of it – whether it’s to have a better orgasm or to feel more comfortable in your skin – and communicate it clearly.
Keep in mind , tantra goes beyond physical sex and penetration. You can work up to that or decide not to go there at all. It sure does come in handy to have your partner hand you a handjob (pun intended, and ok, I’ll retire as a writer), but you’ve felt nothing until you try a tantric massage.